How to write a best man speech in 6 easy steps

The best man’s speech is a traditional part of the wedding day and the cause of more than a few sleepless nights on the part of the best man – and often the groom!

Here is my 6 step guide how to write the best best man’s speech.

Step 1 – remember the point

Despite the frequent jokes at the expense of the groom – the point of the best man’s speech is to make the bride and the groom look good on their wedding day.  

Your job is to serve the bride and groom by making them look good and serve their guests by helping them enjoy the day.  

Your job is not to make the best man look good.

Step 2 – plan the speech

Don’t try to make it up on the day – this will just make you and everyone else stressed, and you risk saying something you might regret later! Especially if you have had a Bucks-Fizz or two in order to calm your nerves

Take a few minutes to plan the best man’s speech by answering the questions in the next steps

Step 3 – get inspired

Write down two positive things about the groom – they could be character traits or achievements – all the better if they are not well known to the guests.  For example, perhaps he walked to Everest basecamp to raise money for charity or he is always the first to volunteer to help out a friend in need.

Next, write down one quirk or less positive trait about the groom – but keep it light hearted and not something which implies any negative impact on others.  For example, you could mention his poor dress sense when he goes clubbing, awful haircut or how often he gets lost yet refuses to ask for directions.

Step 4 – find a structure

How can you link the three points you came up with in step 3?  Are they all linked to a common theme such a travel (they all happened in different parts of the world) or could you use them to relate the timeline of the groom’s life (in his teens he did this…, then in his 20s he did that, then in his 30s…).

You could use your relationship as a timeline: “I first meet the groom when he turned up late for our first lecture at university… and he’s been late for pretty much everything else since then”

Perhaps the groom’s hobbies or passions can provide a structure.  “The groom is a huge fan of Gloucester Rugby – which just shows he is a dreamer and used to disappointment.  But much like a game of rugby the grooms life has been a series of …..”

Step 5 – share the love

Praise the bride and the bridesmaids for their beauty.

Praise the groom – perhaps for his great choice of bride – and list other traits which confirm the bride made the right decision by saying “I do!” 

Step 6 – thank everyone

Thank the groom for the honour of being his best man

Thank the bridesmaids for a job well done and thank the guests for attending

Finish with a toast to the bridesmaids and then toast the bride and groom.

Help writing a best mans speech

If you would like help to write your best man’s speech or to refine your first draft, my speech writing service could help.

I can help you craft the perfect speech and coach you how to deliver it so you feel relaxed and confident on the day.

Learn more about my Speech Writing service